Couples Coaching

Who I work with

Wildcat Gorge

Wildcat Gorge

Most Essential Strengths client couples come to coaching for one of  three reasons:

–  They have a commitment to work proactively to maintain the vitality of their relationship before experiencing crises (much as they practice preventive medicine).

– They are experiencing challenges that create ongoing stress, such as:

  • repeated conflicts that don’t get resolved,
  • different stages or directions of personal growth, or
  • communication styles that make conflict a negative experience rather than a source of new information and possibilities.

– They have decided to end their marriage relationship but want to be certain that they create the skills and structure to work effectively together in any remaining relationships (parents, friends, extended family members).

How we work together

As you can see from my background (Meet Suzanne), I was happily married for almost 25 years, have been happily divorced for over 10 years, and have experienced deep fulfillment as a mother for 31 years. Each of these experiences brings strength and depth to my work with couples.

My certification in relationship training through Center for Right Relationship Global ™ leverages this experience with powerful tools that enhance the qualities of a relationship in any stage. One of my relationship coaching certification classmates comments frequently, “You actually see the world through this lens of relationships as systems,” and, in fact, I do.

I coach your relationship, not the two of you as individuals in a relationship. This is a subtle but transformative distinction, because it consciously incorporates the power of systems theory. Your relationship has an energy, a direction and needs of its own. What is unfolding for each of you individually has a strong impact, but I listen for the voice of the relationship and what it is looking to create. It usually has a wisdom that’s greater than the sum of your individual perspectives.

In our work together, you’ll learn to:

– differentiate between relationship issues that have solutions and “perpetual” issues that require ongoing negotiation and management – and develop the skills to work with each

– recognize a repair bid – and know what to do with it

– know when neutrality is a plus in resolving conflict and when it creates distance

– hear and honor the dream behind your partner’s complaints

As in my work with business partnerships and teams, I use the skills and tools of the Organization and Systems Relationship Coaching (ORSC ™) model developed by the Center for Right Relationship (CRRGlobal) which integrates aspects of  Co-Active Coaching™, Systems Theory, Process Work, Alternative Dispute Resolution, Quantum Physics and Taoism in a pragmatic and powerful set of tools that support relationship in all forms.